Lessons learned from being deaf

It’s usually difficult for a deaf person to fit into the hearing world. Many hearing people are understanding, but there are also those who don’t want to understand hearing loss, or don’t care enough to try, or even mock deafness.

A lot of people think I’m stupid because I haven’t heard them, even family and friends get annoyed sometimes. It’s common to be patronised when you haven’t ‘caught on’ or misunderstood something that was said.

Being unable to hear isn’t bad, it’s just different, and in a way I’m grateful for my disability because it made me the confident business owner I am today. I am a strong believer in paying it forward, so I’ve written this article to share some of the life lessons I learned from being deaf. This article is the first article of a three-part series on “being deaf.” Read on to find out what I’ll publish about next week.

Being hard-of-hearing requires a lot of patience. Imagine talking to a friend in a noisy restaurant. The conversation has just taken a turn from light and breezy to a serious discussion about your relationship. There’s a pause. Your friend is looking at you waiting for your response. You ask him to repeat the question. After numerous repetitions, you still have no idea what he’s asking.

Imagine feeling like that all the time. It’s worse in group conversations. It’s like trying to watch the small black dot on a ping pong ball as it bounces around the room.

I always thought it would be a blessing if each person could be blind and deaf for a few days during his early adult life. Darkness would make him appreciate sight; silence would teach him the joys of sound.

– Helen Keller.

Being unable to hear in a hearing world and succeeding requires a lot of hard work. You need to motivate yourself to make consistent progress. Here’s what I’ve learned so far:

Life Lesson 1: Communication is everybody’s responsibility

Clear communication is essential in every relationship, be it friend, family or colleague. It’s their responsibility, just as much as it is yours, to communicate clearly and effectively, ensuring everyone’s on the same page and fully informed.

If you’re an employer wondering how you can improve communication with hard-of-hearing employees, you might find our access to work services will add some guidance.

Life Lesson 2: Everybody should have access to information

You have the right to access information, the same as everyone else. Being deaf or hard-of-hearing doesn’t make your needs any less important.

Life Lesson 3: Recognise your strengths

My biggest regret was not starting my business years ago. I wanted to but didn’t know which services or products I wanted to offer, and I didn’t recognise my own strengths.

My talents and interests were later clear to me; they were staring me in the face the whole time. Lip reading, communication skills, an interest in technology and captioning.

Don’t compare yourself to others, hearing or not. Concentrate on your strengths. Develop your talents and strengths, and you’ll achieve a better sense of fulfilment and forward progress.

Life Lesson 4: Develop a fierce belief in your capabilities

When you’ve discovered your strengths, you must foster an unwavering belief in your ability to deliver results. You know what you’re capable of, now show that to the rest of the world.

If you’re going to succeed in life, despite deafness, you first need to have faith that you are capable of success. Belief in yourself and what you can achieve will inspire others to believe in you too.

Life Lesson 5: Redefine your “Can’t”

Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do something or achieve something because you can’t hear. You can and you will. It takes courage to succeed and commitment to achieve excellence. Make the honest effort of doing the best you can every day, and you’ll quickly convert those naysayers into cheerleaders.

Not being able to hear isn’t all bad. Much like every dark cloud having a silver lining, being unable to hear also has its perks, such as:

• Being able to switch off from the noisy world.
• Ignoring gossip and only tuning into the conversations that add value.
• Always having a peaceful night’s sleep, no matter that the neighbour is having another raging party.
• Laser-like focus, no sound equals fewer distractions
• Lip reading skills.
• Improved intuition. I’m not sure if all deaf and hard-of-hearing people experience this, but I am more in-tuned with people’s emotions.
• Picking up on cues and clues others haven’t noticed; Sherlock Holmes wishes he has my skills.
• My Hearing Dog, who is my constant companion and bodyguard.

It’s important that you stay positive. Believe in yourself. I encourage you to discover your strengths and don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do something. You can. I did it. So can you. Be determined and follow your heart.

If you’re curious about what it’s like being deaf and self-employed, don’t miss our next blog post.